How To Stop Global Warming

For years, environmentalists have come up with new ideas for slowing or even stopping Global Warming. Most of these ideas are...(how can I put this?)...INSANE. Noted Global Warming expert Sheryl Crow (sense the sarcasm) even came up her own idea for using just one square of toilet paper each time you drop a deuce. Naturally, after she was ridiculed for her stupidity, she claimed it was all a "joke." Sure it was.

These environmentalists, however, are not joking. They have developed what they consider to be completely rational and logical methods for combating Global Warming. And, they say all of this with a straight face.

Via the Herald Sun:
1. Get rid of humans.
Greenpeace co-founder Paul Watson insists we "reduce human populations to fewer than one billion".

2. Put a carbon tax on babies.
Prof Barry Walters, of the University of Western Australia, says families with more than, say, two children should be charged a carbon tax on their little gas emitters.

3. Cull babies.
Toni Vernelli, of green group PETA, says she killed her unborn child because of its potential emissions: "It would have been immoral to give birth to a child that I felt strongly would only be a burden to the world."

4. Sterilise us all.
Dr John Reid, a former Swinburne University academic, gave a lecture on ABC radio recommending we "put something in the water, a virus that would be specific to the human reproductive system, and would make a substantial proportion of the population infertile."

5. Ban second children.
Says Melbourne University population guru Prof Short: "We need to develop a one-child family policy because we are the global warmers."

6. Feed babies rats' milk.
PETA campaigner Heather Mills, ex-wife of Paul McCartney, says cows' burps are heating up the world and we should use milk from other animals: "Why don't we try drinking rats' milk and dogs' milk?"

7. Eat kangaroo, not beef.
Greenpeace says kangaroos don't belch like cows, so are greener and should be eaten first.

8. Shut industries.
Greens leader Bob Brown says we must scrap all coal-fired power stations and our $23 billion export trade in coal.

9. Wash less.
Says actor Cate Blanchett: "I have little races with myself, thinking: 'Oh no, I'm not washing my hair, I only need a two-minute shower'."

10. Sweat more.
The green-crusading editor of the (airconditioned) Age says we should turn off airconditioners in summer: "Our consumer society has long abandoned the fan or the cold bath as the way to keep summer at bay."

11. Use human corpses as fertiliser.
Robert Larkins, founder of the Victorian Environment Defenders' Office, wants gassy cremations banned and humans buried where trees can use their bodies for food.

12. Use coolies, not machines.
Climate Care is offering to offset emissions from jet travel by hiring poor Indians to use manual treadle pumps -- once used in British prisons -- rather than diesel pumps to pump irrigation water: "Sometimes the best source of renewable energy is the human body itself."

13.Ban cars on alternate days.
Local pollster Hugh Mackay says "cars' emissions are stealthily killing us" and we could "halve the fleet, at one stroke, by adopting the odds-and-evens number plate system."

14. Use horses instead.
The French National Stud Organisation says horses are already replacing petrol-powered vehicles in 70 French towns, and should be used to pull school buses.

15. Stop flying.
Green author George Monbiot says flying is too gassy: "It is becoming morally unacceptable now to fly to go on holiday."

16. Ban street lights.
Ivan Brooks, a mayor in Adelaide, says street lights should go off after midnight to save emissions.

17. Ban Christmas lights, too.
Spain's Ecologistas and Accion environment groups says Christmas lights should be banned before Christmas day, to save energy.

18. Ban Hanukkah candles.
The Arkada green consulting firm is running a "Green Hanukkah" campaign asking Jews to use one less candle to "save the planet."

19. End democracy.
Says green academic Mayer Hillman, author of How We Can Save the Planet: "When the chips are down I think democracy is a less important goal than is the protection of the planet from the death of life, the end of life on it. (Carbon rationing) has got to be imposed on people whether they like it or not."

I would laugh, but these nutcases are considered to be quite rational by our media and the mindless followers of the Religion of Global Warming. They are thought to be the brightest minds in the world, here to offer there genius in pursuit of our salvation.

And, their movement is gaining momentum.


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